Train
discard-icon
vip-icon
Silly Trinkets
B
Bharatdewasisirohi

Silly Trinkets

words:16273 Chapter:6
Arwen elrond Gandalf genderswap fem!bilbo
There are no words adequate to describe the Last Homely House or the wonders of Lord Elrond’s hospitality, which seems impossible to strain even under the burden of thirteen empty dwarfish stomachs and their even more trying attitudes. Having played hostess to those same stomachs in her time, Briar is duly impressed and endeavors to add to the burden as little as possible. This is made somewhat more difficult by the fact that elves, apparently, are better able to differentiate between hobbit gentlemen and hobbit ladies that dwarves seem to be. A fact Briar learned when Lord Elrond pulled her to one side after their meal and put her into the hands of his daughter and her women with a gentle smile. Briar feels that she probably owes him a swift kick in the shins for that.
2024/12/12 10:13 Update
97.3K
0
912
There are no words adequate to describe the Last Homely House or the wonders of Lord Elrond’s hospitality, which seems impossible to strain even under the burden of thirteen empty dwarfish stomachs and their even more tiresome attitudes. Having played hostess to those same stomachs in her time, Bri
0 comment
No one has written anything yet. Leave a comment now.

Explore Related

Everything that Matters
Everything that Matters
Sam almost always met the kiddos and their parents before school started. So it was pretty strange when Sam never met Ruby's father until Parent-Teacher Conference day in November.
5.5K words
4.4K
Black Market Briefs
Black Market Briefs
The pissing contest between Director Krennic and Grand Moff Tarkin is the stuff of legends. This time, it's about underwear. Reader gets caught in the middle of their ongoing argument. Or: 'The One Where Reader Helps Tarkin and Krennic Temporarily Accept Each Others' Design Choices Through Spontaneous Nookie'
5.4K words
4.8K
... she screws it all up
... she screws it all up
The seventh time, she screws it all up.
1.4K words
5.0K
Fancy
Fancy
When Clint and Tony go on their first date Clint is far out of his dept. He doesn't know how to be fancy or high class just awkward. Luckily Tony notices but can there date be salvaged?
4.3K words
3.9K
The dirty princess
The dirty princess
Sansa found her way to keep her maidenhood intact
2.1K words
6.1K
One of Those Days
One of Those Days
The arc reactor, despite being a technical marvel, is quite invasive. There have to be side effects to its presence in Tony's chest beyond the now-resolved Palladium poisoning. The team are about to find out just how debilitating it can be. This would be easier if Tony didn't feel the compulsion to hide the fact that he's sick. Misunderstandings all around, especially given Stark's reputation.
21.2K words
89.4K
Action!
Action!
They say desperate times call for desperate measures, but Tachibana Makoto never imagined they’d involve an audition for a porn studio. Neither did he expect the studio’s star actor – a guy Makoto’s been, well... admiring from the other side of a screen and a pixel mosaic -- to be his first co-star, or that the eccentric and enigmatic Haruka isn’t the only troublesome thing awaiting him at Free!Boys Studios…
12.9K words
7.7K
Undisclosed Desires
Undisclosed Desires
Holmes and Watson decide to become friends with benefits in order to relieve some of the sexual tension between them. Naturally, it turns into something else entirely.
5.1K words
5.8K
all nearness pauses
all nearness pauses
For a brief moment, he feels the frantic beat of his heart skidding faster, each pulse tripping over the next, and considers jumping out the window. Better to die than embarrass myself in front of Beka, he thinks. He discards the idea only because 1) they’re on the first floor, 2) he’s not a fucking quitter, and 3) he really, really wants to get fucked tonight.
5.8K words
7.1K
Such Beauty is Wasted
Such Beauty is Wasted
“The cowboy always rides off into the sunset by himselfAnd monsters don’t get happy endings.” When Jesse McCree first set out to a certain abandoned village for a chance to lay low, he didn't expect to encounter a monster, let alone end up sticking around.(a beauty and the beast au)
27.7K words
4.6K
Abetting Jack
Abetting Jack
Before the werewolves happened, there was alcoholism and child neglect and panic attacks. And at the end Scott's dad acted like a bully before he abandoned his family. Anyone still wondering where all the hero complexes come from? Spoiler for season 3a (sort of not really) This story is my head-canon for all the bits we got for that fuzzy timeline in Scott and Stiles lives when Claudia was dead and the Sheriff was drinking and a guy who I really thought would be a dead-beat abusive spouse turned out to be a FBI agent. I'm probably getting jossed as soon as Season 3b hit the air, but in the meantime, enjoy!
5.0K words
5.2K
I am here now
I am here now
The Holmes boy's have fell in a deep depression, John and Greg don't know until it is to late. Sherlock finds drugs.Mycroft finds emptiness.John finds Sherlock.Greg finds Mycroft.
3.5K words
4.4K
Denying the Undeniable
Denying the Undeniable
In the summer before Harry's seventh year at Hogwarts he undergoes a change that will impact the entire wizarding world. Harry once more finds himself different than everyone else and needs someone to help him deal with it. Along with the change comes a bond with a Vampire who has been denying his instincts for years. Can Harry adapt to his new powers and perception of the world? And can his mate overcome his desire to remain alone, realizing that his decision means life or death for them both?Ignores most of HBP and all of DH, takes plot liberties with other books as well. Most ratings and warnings are for later chapters.
66.5K words
7.3K
Blank Slate
Blank Slate
Alternate S2.01. Juan's cheating during the race causes a more serious accident but one that may go in his favour as he attempts to manipulate an amnesiac Cesare, even as his jealousy grows at his family's attempts to comfort his brother.
3.8K words
13.7K
Trump Diet
Trump Diet
Donald Trump gets elected, and Bucky Barnes eats his feelings.
26.7K words
14.9K
It's Only Spilled Coffee
It's Only Spilled Coffee
Or the one where Derek is an awkward history major and likes to stare at the junior who lives in his dorm building. -- For mine and Keri's fic battle. :3
1.8K words
4.8K
Your Law of Gravity
Your Law of Gravity
The sequel to It Takes a lot of Water. A new moon rises and our party must acclimate to new surroundings and society, filled with monumental emotional and physical challenges. In the acres surrounding Lake Claiborne, Louisiana, in a pride that has flourished for generations, a new Alpha decides their survival in this world.
99.5K words
20.5K
What An Idiot
What An Idiot
In which Kili is terrible at flirting, so Fili shows him how it's done. Kili is less than amused. Cue jealousy and bets being made.
1.8K words
7.8K
Fifty Shades of Fili and Kili XXXI - XL
Fifty Shades of Fili and Kili XXXI - XL
1. Roleplay, medical examination2. Narratophilia, bottom!Kili and bottom!Fili3. Omegaverse, Kili decides he wants to get pregnant4. Public sex, Fili claims his brother at a feast5. Public sex, Kili pleasures his brother in a cinema and a library6. Fem!Kili teases her brother7. It's been a long time since Fili bottomed and he'd like to try it again8. Back seat sex9. Even though Kili's eaten his fill, he still has room for more
11.6K words
20.3K
almost is never enough
almost is never enough
Seokjin might be the most oblivious person Jungkook has ever had the fortune of knowing. [discontinued]
24.2K words
7.1K
Fixed Trajectory
Fixed Trajectory
He's got Clint at point-blank range.
1.5K words
5.4K
Tumblr drabbles
Tumblr drabbles
Collection of drabbles from my tumblr 01) Thorin/Bilbo Dwalin/Nori; gen02) Fili Kili Ori magical girls AU; gen03) Dwalin/Nori merpeople; gen04) Dwalin/female!Nori AU; gen05) Dwalin/Nori imprisoned together; gen06) Dwalin/Nori fairytale AU; gen07) Dwalin/Nori pre-wedding jitters; gen08) Thorin/Bilbo Dwalin/Nori training Bilbo in burglarizing; gen09) Dwalin/Nori tourists; gen10) Nori/Bilbo light; gen11) female!Dwalin/Nori the beginning; gen12) Dwalin/Nori alpha/omega; gen13) Dwalin/female!Nori first meeting; gen14) Dwalin/Nori day after the BOFA anniversary; teen15) Dwalin/Nori why didn't you?; gen16) Ori/Kili don't trust me; teen17) Dwalin/Nori I can't breath!; mature18) Dwalin/Nori Please, put me DOWN!; gen19) Dwalin/Nori bunny&ribbons; gen20) Bifur/Nori (kind of one-sided) robots in a secret relationship; teen21) Fili/Nori he craves that mineral; mature22) Dwalin/Nori size difference; gen23) Dwalin/Nori cooking together; gen24) Dwalin/Nori foreheads thouching; explicit25) Dwalin/Nori 10 one sentence prompts more or less; explicit
9.1K words
6.1K