9x03

Bilbo Baggins led a rather peaceful life, thank you very much, until an old acquaintance decided to turn it upside down, and he found himself agreeing to take a job that’s… let’s say not exactly up his alley, and might eventually cost him a little more than his treasured cozy lifestyle. Who would have thought tutoring a slightly menacing monarch’s more than slightly overbearing nephew could prove to be such an adventure?

Bilbo liked Erebor, he really did. Even if everyone seemed convinced he was going to leave. In which soil causes international incidents, Thorin is over-dramatic, and dwarves are rubbish at keeping secrets. Oh, and they build a garden. Eventually.

Bilba Baggins, popular model for a premier lingerie company, isn't always entirely convinced that the perks of the job are worth the hassle. Can't she even go to the shops without being recognized? But Thorin Oakenshield doesn't seem to recognize her at all, even with her nearly-naked breasts forever plastered across half of London. That's... a very refreshing change.

Bilba Baggins, Hobbit Burglar of Erebor finds herself back in Bag End, young and healthy once more, she begins enjoying her afterlife in Yavannas Garden (the Hobbit equivalent to the Halls of Waiting) when thirteen familiar Dwarves turn up at her door, raid her pantry and start throwing about her dishes. Gandalf is convinced she's the right Hobbit Burglar for the job, but Bilba's done all this before and no one remembers but her. What's a Hobbit to do?

Bilbo is quite convinced that all the problems plaguing them in the mountain - specifically, Thorin acting quite unlike himself - stem from the blasted Arkenstone. The thing is probably cursed, and it's up to him to get it as far away from Thorin as he can - and while he's at it, he might as well try to stop a war before it starts. Rather than offering Bard and Thranduil the Arkenstone, Bilbo offers to give them his share of the treasure if they will please go away. Unfortunately, neither of them is willing to believe Thorin will hand it over - which leads to a ransom plan that is, in Bilbo's opinion, quite ridiculous and doomed to fail from the start. But at least that blasted stone is out of the mountain.

There is a reason why the hobbits don't leave the Shire. The story of Bullroarer Took had more to it then what Gandalf knew about. The goblins have a long memory and hold a grudge against any and all hobbits, especially Tooks. A story of where Bilbo didn't fall down deeper in the goblin caves and finds the Ring, but was brought in front of the Goblin Kings wrath.

Bilbo Baggins fears for the day when the Breeders will come for him, as that day draws closer an old friend visits, bringing along with him Dwarves, adventure and most all.... Hope.

Everything happens so fast in Erebor. Bilbo returns, to a life that promises well-deserved happiness, but he would be a fool to think that finding that happiness by the side of a monarch would come without its surprises and adventures.The sequel to Nothing Gold Can Stay, at long last.

Bilbo was choking. His lungs burned with the acrid tang of smoke. Through his streaming eyes, the harsh light of enchanted fires and the glint of dirty orc steel blurred and swam in the darkness. The panicked yells of the dwarves, helplessly clinging to the falling pine tree, were a bold clash against the shrieking cacophony of snapping roots, fierce Warg howls, and the popping of the flames. Above all that, Bilbo heard the sound of Thorin’s skull crunching against stone, his body falling limp against the dry ground. A spike of sharp fear jolted through Bilbo’s chest, and his troubled breathing hitched. No. *** Bilbo takes a leap of faith during the pine tree altercation between the company and Azog, and the repercussions that follow force all the members of the company to re-evaluate the worth of their burglar. One dwarven king included.

Bilbo and Ori are two broke University graduates with nothing to their name but their degrees and a tiny flat. Ori gets tired of it and signs them both up to find Sugar Daddies via a very helpful website. Bilbo has apprehensions until he meets a certain brooding man named Thorin. Then things just get even more confusing...

After struggling as a single mom of two rambunctious boys for years, Dis reluctantly joins a local support group for mothers with troublesome children and finds that her problems are hardly unusual.

When Ciel has a 'Problem' and you offer Sebastian to help.

Elves and dwarves are enemies in the Third Age, but what if that enemy ensnares your heart? Wicked little Cupid strikes again, and the laws of attraction clash with the rules of fate to wreak havoc on the lives of an elf warrior and two princes. But the bigger question…will it matter at all when their peoples wage war, and all of Middle Earth is threatened by the resurgence of a powerful evil? What is the true power of Eros to alter destiny? Setting: DOS, BOFA and beyond, alternate storylinePairing: Kili and TaurielCharacters: All canon Tolkien and Jackson; some OCs.(Moderate editing of the same story on FanFiction.Net) Disclaimer blabber: Not my characters, no copyright infringement intended, don't receive any monies for this, etc.