squatting

Now that Harry is back at Hogwarts with Hermione for eighth year, he realises that something’s missing from his life, and it either has to do with Ron, his boggart, Snape, or Malfoy. Furthermore, what, exactly, does it mean when one’s life is defined by the desire to simultaneously impress and annoy a portrait? Harry has no idea; he’s too busy trying not to be in love with Malfoy to care.

Izumi’s dreams don’t belong to her. They belong to the lights, the people who are in pain. She helps them, every night, trying to forget the color of her mother’s blood and the light of her fathers flame. She helps, even though she herself is shattered. Hello! First posted fic, ever, so please give feedback!(Edit after completion: I promise my grammar gets better bear with me until I go back to edit sixteen year old me’s typing.)

Twenty years ago, the Warlord of the North came down out of the mountains and slew the king of Kaedwen, taking crown and kingdom for his own. Everyone expected him to be overthrown almost immediately, but he has only grown ever more secure in his position. Finally, the other countries around Kaedwen have begun to negotiate with him as they would any other king. To seal the new treaty between Redania and the Warlord, Lady Milena de Roggeven, third daughter of the Duke of Roggeven, has been sent to marry whichever of the Warlord’s men he chooses. Milena is starkly terrified of everything about her new husband; every rumor she has ever heard about the barbarians of the north seems worse than the last, and Lambert clearly despises the very thought of marriage. Lambert of the Wolves is still grieving his lost lover, dead more than three years now. The last thing he wants is to be married off to a terrified stranger, and he can’t imagine why Geralt and Eskel think he of all people is suited to a diplomatic marriage. And neither of them suspects the treachery that lies behind the treaty which binds them together.

Moving into the dorms, the students get to witness a side of their teacher they didn’t even know had existed--a side much softer, and, dare they say, human, than any of them had ever expected to see. (Or, 5 things class 1-A never expected from Aizawa, and 1 thing he never expected from them.)

When she was only three, Anne's parents died in a car accident. At the funeral, she was kidnapped by a group of scientists whose motive was to find a way to impregnate a human with animal sperm. Of the hundreds of girls that were taken for this operation, Anne happened to be the most fertile, which led to her losing her virginity at the age of eight. As such, at the age of twelve, Anne was the first of many girls to be sent out into a forest to breed with a variety of different animals. Fortunately, this extremely immoral experiment came to an end when the government uncovered and promptly arrested all the members involved. But the damage had been done. As Anne wanders the forest in search of answers, she realizes that there are other creatures lurking behind the cover of the trees and that the only way to answer her questions was to satisfy their desires.

When Geralt stops at an inn to get out of the rain, he doesn't expect to leave with a young, mistreated omega whore in tow. But fate is a funny thing, isn't it? Or, Jaskier is an omega forced to prostitute himself at an inn. Geralt is an alpha who rescues him.

Harry Potter is murdered, crucified for the last-ditch effort at the greater good. But death is not as black and white as one would want it, not when Death claims you as his master. Harry has a do-over, reincarnated back into his past life, with all the knowledge he needs to piece back together with an old enemy that might just be the only one that can save him from his grizzly fate in 1999. Thinking back on it there really should have been a rule. Don’t travel back in time if you are just going to fall in love with the person that you are destined to kill. And as an add on if you are going to fall in love with them make sure that they stay focused on the task at hand and do not overindulge in dark magic and madness along the way.

A collection of small ficlets showing tiny moments in the Accidental Warlord universe. Note: This work includes spoilers for later works in the AW AU, and should probably be read last.

A collection of MadaTobi minifics.

Accidental bonding. Breaking and entering. Conspiring, however unwillingly, in the strange one-man war Malfoy's waging against detention. This isn't the normal school year Harry anticipated having, but at least it's not boring.

Kirishima attempts to climb the ladder of success and weasel his way into Bakugou Katsuki's explosive little heart. Step one? He has to get to level ten.

The Blacks want to marry off their youngest child. He begs Sirius for help and tells him a secret: He is a man and would rather die than be forced to be anyone's wife.Panicked, Sirius arranges a marriage between his brother and his friend James Potter, knowing that Regulus can be the man he is in the English countryside on James' estate. James wants to ensure Regulus' happiness, even at the expense of putting his life on hold for a while.Regulus wants to ensure James doesn't fall into societal ruin because of him.Sirius wants to be loved.Barty must decide whether he wants to keep causing destruction or choose redemption.And Remus is just a very tired butler who watches James and Regulus dance around their actual feelings (literally). (Trans Reggie; set in the Victorian Age, 1890s. No horrible homophobia or transphobia depicted. Dysphoria is thematised.)

Quirkless, young adult Midoriya Izuku has a problem. Namely, he has a crush on his purple haired, tired-looking neighbor. They keep running into each other and the guy is actually pretty nice under that deadpan facade, has a sense of humor, doesn't seem to judge anyone for their quirk status, and is constantly spoiling any cat in the building that finds him. (He's also a shameless flirt.) But Izuku has concerns. About the strange bruises and bloodied knuckles. About the weapons he's seen when stopping by for a cup of sugar. About the shady-looking figures he's accidentally spotted his neighbor meeting with. About the fact that right after the news reported a big crime bust, his neighbor came home beat all to hell and looking haunted. Izuku has a problem. Namely, he has a crush on his neighbor, who he's pretty sure is secretly a villain. And he has no idea what to do with that. (or: Adult!ShinZuku AU where Shinsou is an underground, undercover pro hero trying to find a lead on a case that may or may not involve the socially awkward guy living next door. Misunderstandings abound.)

Jungkook has been Jimin's best friend for the past eight years, and Jimin has been secretly in love with him for just as long. But when Jungkook starts dating someone else, Jimin is finally forced to confront his feelings head-on.

Midoriya Izuku's quirk: Perfect Recall. The ability to relive any part of his past with all five senses isn't exactly the most powerful of quirks. Despite that, Izuku's going to become a hero. Even if he has to essentially fight quirkless.But then one long, long, day, he meets her. And everything changes. Or: If Uraraka had a second quirk, one that lets her rewind the entire world back to a specific point. The only catch? Her own memory gets reset along with everyone else-everyone, that is, but a single boy with a weak quirk.

When Tony is handed a cat carrier by a bloody and battered Steve, he thinks Steve wants him to simply take the cat to the vet and babysit it. That should be a simple task, after all - this is Steve's cat, and Tony loves cats - he'd do anything to keep one safe and sound. He hadn't thought he would have another cat living with him after his old cat, Peggs, died of old age. Tony knows cats. This should be a piece of cake. Unfortunately for Tony, the cat isn't exactly a cat - it's Bucky Barnes.

This will be where all the smutty requests from my Tumblr inbox go. Sometimes the request will get it's own individual story if it's something I feel I want to expand and write more about, but most of the shit that goes here will be porn without plot, fucked up little sex scenes and kinks I've been requested to explore or write. Check the tags before proceeding and they'll be added as I do each prompt, will be a shit ton of non-con and other dubious fucked up shit, so you've been warned.

An AU where the Avengers are not a superhero team, but rather a group of cats that Phil Coulson owns and brings in to the SHIELD offices. Kinkmeme prompt here.

“I’m going to get my scars removed,” Draco announces on a rainy Wednesday afternoon. “Who are you seeing?” Blaise asks. “The best Healer out there,” Draco replies with a little shrug. “Harry Potter.”

It started with a liquor-fuelled night of fun and ended with Ichigo on all fours. Curious about the Shihouin family secret, Ichigo engrosses himself in a new form of training, and accidentally endears himself to Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez. The only problem is that Ichigo is living a double life, and Grimmjow has no idea the shinigami he detests is also his newfound stray friend.

Undoing the apocalypse would have been enough for Jon, if all his people survived. Without them, Jon's only recourse is making it so it never happened in the first place. He's going to do better this time.